Are you having what feels like the same arguments again and again? Does conflict leave you feeling more disconnected than before? Have trust or feelings of security been damaged? Do you feel like you and your partner are speaking different languages, even when you are trying your hardest to understand each other?

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Maybe your relationship is not in crisis, but something feels off. The closeness you once had has faded. You are more like roommates than partners. Or perhaps things are good, but you want to make sure they stay that way and learn how to support one another through whatever life brings.

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Whatever brings you here, you are not alone. Every couple struggles at times, and seeking help is a sign of strength, not failure.

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I offer virtual couples therapy throughout Utah and California, using Gottman Method Therapy blended with attachment-focused techniques to help partners reconnect, communicate more effectively, and build a relationship that feels secure and fulfilling.

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What Is Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy, also called couples counseling, marriage counseling, or relationship therapy, is a space where you and your partner can work through challenges with the support of a trained therapist. It is not about assigning blame or deciding who is right. It is about understanding each other more deeply, breaking patterns that are not working, and learning skills to navigate conflict and connection.

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Many couples wait too long before seeking help, often years after problems first appear. By the time they reach out, resentment has built up and distance has grown. The sooner you address issues in your relationship, the easier they are to resolve. But even if you have been struggling for a long time, change is still possible.

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How Couples Therapy Can Help Your Relationship

Relationship counseling is a good fit for couples who need help with:

• Communication problems. If conversations frequently turn into arguments, if you feel unheard or misunderstood, or if you avoid talking about important issues because it never goes well, couples therapy can help you learn to communicate in ways that bring you closer instead of pushing you apart.

• Recurring conflict. If you find yourselves having the same fight over and over without resolution, there is usually something deeper going on beneath the surface. Therapy can help you understand the underlying needs and fears driving these patterns.

• Disconnection or emotional distance. If you feel like you have grown apart, lost your spark, or become more like roommates than romantic partners, couples counseling can help you rebuild intimacy and emotional connection.

• Trust issues or betrayal. Whether trust has been broken by infidelity, dishonesty, or other betrayals, healing is possible. It requires commitment from both partners and often the support of a skilled therapist.

• Life transitions. Major changes like having children, career shifts, relocation, or retirement can strain even strong relationships. Therapy can help you navigate these transitions as a team.

• Attachment differences. If one of you tends toward anxious attachment while the other leans avoidant, you may find yourselves caught in painful cycles of pursuit and withdrawal. Understanding these patterns is key to changing them.

• Preparing for marriage or long-term commitment. Premarital counseling helps you build a strong foundation before challenges arise, addressing potential issues and developing shared goals.

 

My Approach to Couples Therapy

I am trained in the Gottman Method, one of the most research-backed approaches to couples therapy. Developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman after decades of studying what makes relationships succeed or fail, this method provides practical tools for improving communication, managing conflict, and deepening connection.

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In our first sessions, I assess for your relationship's strengths and areas for growth. This gives us a clear picture of where you are starting from and what we need to work on together.

 

From there, we focus on building skills. You can learn how to:

• Start difficult conversations without triggering defensiveness

• Recognize and interrupt the Four Horsemen that predict relationship breakdown: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling

• Repair after conflict so that arguments do not leave lasting damage

• Turn toward each other's bids for connection instead of away

• Build friendship and fondness, which form the foundation of lasting love

• Navigate differences and reach compromises that work for both of you

• Create shared meaning and a vision for your future together

 

I can also help you understand the deeper patterns in your relationship, including how your individual histories and attachment styles shape how you relate to each other. This understanding creates compassion and opens the door to real change.

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What to Expect in Couples Counseling Sessions

Couples therapy sessions are 50 minutes long, unless you would prefer to schedule a 75 or 100 minute session.

 

We meet virtually via secure video, which allows you to attend from anywhere in Utah or California without the hassle of commuting.

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In sessions, I create a space where both of you can share your perspectives without judgment. My role is not to take sides but to help you understand each other and find your way forward together. Some sessions may feel intense, especially when we are working through painful issues. That is normal and often necessary for real healing.

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Between sessions, I may ask you to practice skills or complete exercises together. The work you do outside of therapy is just as important as what happens in our sessions. Change happens through consistent effort over time.

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